Anyone who says no in the job is therefore not the same as a bad colleague. Too many jams can even be harmful to your career.
In every company, in every office, in every department, there is this one person who, like a magnet, puts on all the extra work that hides in the corners, suddenly falls from the sky or is simply left behind by the others.
Even new employees who have not even got the coffee machine, already know who is in the circle of colleagues the ideal – because inconsistent – work shed. You quickly see through who’s still sitting in the evenings, when everyone else has already shut down their computers – and to whom you forward the annoying mail, which is only three lines long, but causes as many hours of work.
It’s bad enough to watch one by one stomp over the human doormat. It is even worse if you yourself are this doormat.
Career starters quickly fall into this trap, they still want to make it all right. The boss – but rather the colleagues. After all, they are the ones with whom you spend most of your time and whose goodwill is important to you.
But those who let themselves be tempted by others too often and always say yes to everything, not only receive less and less thanks, they also reach their limits quickly and at some point have no energy to take care of their own concerns: be it an important training , the real heart project – or simply leisure and recreation. But no matter how hard you decide to do today, just half an hour instead of the usual two:
When in the afternoon the stressed-out colleague comes in with a crazy eye and places a stack of papers on the already overcrowded desk in a ranting speech that seems to have no objection, all good intentions are often gone. All that remains is a quiet “But I really wanted to-” as the office door clicks into the lock.
Sometimes overtime is just a job
Not always, however, are the complaints, one the whole office shamelessly exploited, also justified. “Especially in attractive and exciting professions, no matter whether it’s television or top-class catering, I can not expect a punctual closing time,” warns career counselor. “People who do that should work in the public library, please.” The Berliner, who often helps mid-thirties to find the ideal job, advises that if she works extra time, she always asks if she herself has any of it. “If I put a special shift on the weekend, I can take responsibility that I do not get in the day-to-day business,” she says. “But if I’m just the one who clears the dishwasher and does other annoying activities that would otherwise leave everyone, that brings me of course nothing.” The shoe of the “colleague pig” you still do not have to dress, the career counselor finds: “Women, in particular, are good at putting themselves in the background for everything to go smoothly.
The job is primarily about achieving something visible. For the company, but also for oneself. “But what to do if you are not just very busy, but suffer from being systematically exploited and disadvantaged by your colleagues? You can not only learn. Here are ten strategies and tips on how to make it easier to cancel a colleague who too often asks, “Can not you go fast?”
Ten strategies for learning how to say no
- No escalating and, above all, not several different reasons why you can not help. Instead stay short and concise, friendly but determined.
- Do not worry – if you get a “I have to have a look” instead of “No”, you already have half of the task on your cheek. Because the longer you wait with the no, the harder it will be to refuse your help. However, if you let yourself be taken by surprise, you can save a short break in concentration with a “Let’s take a quick look at my calendar, then I’ll let you know” – and then say no.
- Anyone who feels insecure at work can also practice saying no in other places. For example, in the hotel once a room and ask for another – or in a crowded café for an hour a large table free.
- Saying goodbye to the idea that you have to be a team player every minute of the day – especially if you have to think for more than half a minute, until you remember when your colleagues last took a job.
- Thinking of where the desire to always do it to everyone and why you do things you do not want out of fear of confrontation alone.
- Do not let a guilty conscience persuade you – if the permanent questioner does not let up, openly address that you feel exploited.
- Nobody likes to be snubbed before others – so do not say this kind of rejection in a big round, but better in private and completely calm and objective.
- Remember that whoever never says no will never be promoted – because then who should do all the work of their current colleagues?
- Practice, practice, practice – the first no is always the hardest, but over time it gets easier. And once word gets around that you can not do any rubbish with you is not necessary any more.
- You can also say no to the boss: anyone who regularly gets more stopped than he can handle should demand that his boss postpone or delegate another for each new project.